Funny Valentines Day Quotes

Keep in mind the first occasion when you met your sweetheart? How entertaining she was and how you were pulled in to her funny lines? Sweethearts who share a comical inclination remain together more, so in the event that you need to win your darling’s heart, use giggling. Fill your heart with joy additional extraordinary with these Funny Valentines Day Quotes 2019. If you want to share more fun with your friends Must watch our Happy Valentines Day Jokes.

Funny Valentines Day Quotes 2019

Funny Valentines Day Quotes 2019

Funny Valentines Day Quotes For All

“A bride at her second wedding does not wear a veil. She wants to see what she is getting.”
Helen Rowland

“Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.”
Groucho Marx

“Get married early in the morning. That way, if it doesn’t work out, you haven’t wasted a whole day.”
Mickey Rooney

“I love being married. It’s so great to find one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.”
Rita Rudner

“I wanted to make it really special on Valentine’s Day, so I tied my boyfriend up. And for three solid hours, I watched whatever I wanted on TV.”
Tracy Smith

Funny Valentines Day Quotes For Friends

Funny Valentines Day Quotes For Friends

“It is impossible to love and be wise.”
Francis Bacon

“It’s funny how we set qualifications for the right person to love when we know at the back of our heads the person whom we truly love will always be an exception.”
Ally McBeal

“Love has the power of making you believe what you would normally treat with the deepest suspicion.”
Mirabeau

“Love is a grave mental disease.”
Plato

“Love is the thing that enables a woman to sing while she mops up the floor after her husband has walked across it in his barn boots.”
“The Hoosier Farmer” magazine

Funny Valentines Day Quotes 2019 For Husband Wife

Funny Valentines Day Quotes 2019 For Husband Wife

“My boyfriend and I broke up. He wanted to get married and I didn’t want him to.”
Rita Rudner

“Never go to bed mad—stay up and fight.”
Phyllis Diller

“No matter how love-sick a woman is, she shouldn’t take the first pill that comes along.”
Joyce Brothers

“One should always be in love. That is the reason one should never marry.”
Oscar Wilde

“The Eskimos have fifty-two words for snow because it is so special to them; there ought to be as many for love.”
Margaret Atwood

Funny Valentine Quotes Image

Funny Valentine Quotes Image

“The poor wish to be rich, the rich wish to be happy, the single wish to be married, and the married wish to be dead.”
Ann Landers

“Three things can’t be hidden: coughing, poverty, and love.”
Yiddish Proverb

“To be in love is merely to be in a state of perceptual anesthesia.”
H. L. Mencken

“Today is Valentine’s Day. Or, as men like to call it, Extortion day.”
Jay Leno

“True love comes quietly, without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked.”
Erich Segal

“Valentine’s Day is when a lot of married men are reminded what a poor shot Cupid really is.”
Anonymous

“Women are cursed, and men are the proof.”
Rosanne Barr

“Women with pasts interest men. They hope history will repeat itself.”
Mae West

Funny Valentines Day Quotes 2019 For Friends

Funny Happy Valentines Day Quotes Images

Funny Happy Valentines Day Quotes Images

All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt

Money can’t buy love, but it improves your bargaining position

Husbands are like fires – they go out when they’re left unattended

Today is Valentine’s Day – or, as men like to call it, Extortion Day!

I want a man who’s kind and understanding. Is that too much to ask of a millionaire?

Funny Valentines Day Quotes 2019 Facebook Status

Funny Valentines Day Quotes 2019 Facebook Status

It’s better to have loved and lost than to have to do forty pounds of laundry a week

Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife

Get married early in the morning. That way, if it doesn’t work out, you haven’t wasted a whole day

Never go to bed mad — stay up and fight

One should always be in love. That is the reason one should never marry

Funny Valentines Day Quotes For Husband Wife

Funny Valentines Day Quotes For Husband Wife

The poor wish to be rich, the rich wish to be happy, the single wish to be married, and the married wish to be dead

To be in love is merely to be in a state of perceptual anesthesia

Valentine’s Day is when a lot of married men are reminded what a poor shot Cupid really is

Love is much nicer to be in than an automobile accident, a tight girdle, a higher tax bracket or a holding pattern over Philadelphia

Funny Valentine Quotes For Loved Ones

Funny Valentine Quotes With Images

Funny Valentine Quotes With Images

LILY TOMLIN
If love is the answer, could you rephrase the question?

PEARL BAILEY
What the world really needs is more love and less paperwork.

FRAN LEBOWITZ
If you can stay in love for more than two years, you’re on something.

TIM ALLEN
A guy knows he’s in love when he loses interest in his car for a couple of days.

MELANIE WHITE
Remember, your Valentine’s card shows you care enough to send the very best, even though you’re too lazy to put it in your own words.

Happy Valentines Day Funny Quotes

Happy Valentines Day Funny Quotes

PHYLLIS DILLER
Marry a man your own age; as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight.

MIKE PRIMAVERA
You are never alone on Valentine’s Day if you’re near a lake and have bread.

KATHY MOHNKE
Marriage is like vitamins: we supplement each other’s minimum daily requirements.

RITA RUDNER
I love being married. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.

Funny Valentines Day Chocolate Quotes 2019

Funny Valentines Day Chocolate Quotes 2019

CHARLES M. SCHULZ
All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt.

ERICH SEGAL
True love comes quietly without banners or flashing lights. If you hear bells, get your ears checked.

WILL FERRELL
Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow internet service to see who they really are.

LEWIS BLACK
Valentine’s Day: the holiday that reminds you that if you don’t have a special someone, you’re alone.

JOAN CRAWFORD
Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your heart or burn down your house, you can never tell.

GARRY SHANDLING
My friends tell me I have an intimacy problem, but they don’t really know me.

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